Raising awareness - my mood impacts my processing

[AllThingsTech]

I want to explain something about how I process situations, because I think it’s contributed to some misunderstandings - this isn’t about me becoming a different person or changing, more about a temporary situation escalating in the moment before I’ve fully processed my interactions. Deescalation is king.

I don’t always recognise the seriousness or impact of something straight away. Sometimes I only fully understand why something is inappropriate, or how it’s affected others, after the situation has already escalated.

My sense of humour in particular can be a bit out of sync with what others expect, and I sometimes misjudge what’s okay to say. This also is very dependent on my mood - when I’m facing mental health challenges, I’ll find anything to laugh at to cheer myself up, and I haven’t even fully computed the feelings of others. I’m so focussed on self-care I end up being selfish in the moment, and I didn’t necessarily realise it at the time.

Even when something is pointed out to me, it can take me a bit of time to fully process and understand the impact of my behaviour. That doesn’t mean I’m ignoring it — it just isn’t always immediate for me.

I understand that this can be frustrating, and I am working on being more aware earlier on. It really helps if concerns are communicated clearly and directly, so I have the best chance of understanding and addressing them before things escalate.

I do take feedback seriously, even if I need a little time to fully take it in, and I’m willing to adjust once I understand the impact.

I’m sorry if I posted anything that upset anyone. I’m trying my best to become more aware. I’m doing my best to manage this but I’m not 100% sure it can be fixed. I’ve been like this ever since I was a kid - lots of ups and downs.

Thanks for understanding!

 

[Tiffany]

It takes a lot to write about who you are and possibly putting yourself in a vulnerable place. NZ is a safe place for that as opposed to a lot of other websites. That says a lot about you and the growth you so desire in your life. If anyone I knew, in real life used these words and asked for some grace in situations where they obviously had to process a situation with a little extra time, I would understand. I hope whatever you are experiencing right now gets to a good place.

 

[Retro]

That was brave of you to write this in public ATT, big respect.

And of course, you can be sure that you'll never be abused here for it.

 

[AllThingsTech]

NZ is a safe place for that as opposed to a lot of other websites.

Indeed it is, if it wasn’t, I’d have been banned here long ago…

 

[AllThingsTech]

And of course, you can be sure that you'll never be abused here for it.

And of course, you can be sure that you’ll never be abused for it, either. For my challenges. For your goodwill. For your leap of faith in me

I’m also lucky you didn’t charge me a babysitting fee for that crap you deleted earlier On a more serious note, I watch stupid shit online when I’m feeling low - adapting to norms can be a challenging for me, as explained. You nuke inappropriate content - that’s still feedback for me. I take it seriously. I’m learning - slow but steady

It takes a lot to write about who you are and possibly putting yourself in a vulnerable place. NZ is a safe place for that as opposed to a lot of other websites. That says a lot about you and the growth you so desire in your life.

NZ doesn’t rigidly hand out punishments like other forums do. The human aspects like empathy, relationships, mutual trust and respect are prioritised here. That, along with the great patience displayed here indeed makes it a safe space for neurospice

 

[Hitcore]

It takes a lot to write about who you are and possibly putting yourself in a vulnerable place. NZ is a safe place for that as opposed to a lot of other websites. That says a lot about you and the growth you so desire in your life. If anyone I knew, in real life used these words and asked for some grace in situations where they obviously had to process a situation with a little extra time, I would understand. I hope whatever you are experiencing right now gets to a good place.

I agree with Tiffany right here. I know that formulating such feelings does not come easy.

Even when something is pointed out to me, it can take me a bit of time to fully process and understand the impact of my behaviour. That doesn’t mean I’m ignoring it — it just isn’t always immediate for me.

This, for example, I recognize all too well. Today at work, as a matter of fact. I was fully immersed in one task, then I got interrupted to perform another task. It took me quite a while to fully switch and then return to the original task. In these scenarios any new tasks take me a bit longer to comprehend.

 

[AllThingsTech]

I experience the same when switching between tasks!
#autisticminds

I was referring to challenges with being hyper, being told something isn’t appropriate, somehow not being aware in the moment and continuing. Then, I regret it all later.

Similarly, I was laughing during a funeral as a kid, because I was already in a good mood. I used to struggle so much to absorb energy from the room momentarily. I’ve improved at this one, though.

 

[Retro]

Similarly, I was laughing during a funeral as a kid, because I was already in a good mood.

Oh boy, that must have been awkward?

 

[AllThingsTech]

Oh boy, that must have been awkward?

 

[AllThingsTech]

You see @Retro
Emotional regulation is an essential life skill.
One cannot deny that

 

[petermarkley]

I’m autistic too, and so is my wife. FWIW I haven’t gotten any ick from any of our interactions (such that they were so far)

 

[AllThingsTech]

@petermarkley I haven’t gotten any ick either.